red onion

I've debated with myself in reviewing the debate. I've expressed concern over some of John Kerry's statements regarding foreign policy in general, and the war in Iraq specifically. I've expressed these concerns to some friends and a couple of forums. The feedback has largely been to encourage me to have faith that John Kerry will do the right thing once he is elected, and I have no faith in anyone to do the right thing in high office right now, or anyone aspiring to be in high office. The only faith I have right now is in my own struggle to see through the veils everyone is wearing to hide either their true light or their true intentions, or both. I don't need anyone to understand why I am struggling with this right now, but it would be nice if at least a few people tried. I know no one is perfect but a few of John Kerry's statements in the debate I just can't let slide. So I will question everything, or as much as I want. I put no trust in believing that someone else knows what is best for me, but when I trust what I know to be best for my future, then I want the troops home now, and I think many of the troops agree with me. I read my favorite liberal blog, Atrios, who today talked about a rationalization for the draft, and did not mention the option of troop withdrawal instead, and I know today is one of those weird days, kinda like I dropped through the rabbit hole, and nothing will ever be the same again. And I'm not regretting this loss of illusion, much, but it feels a little more alone out there right now, and a little colder, mainly because so many, it seems, are enamoured of John Kerry right now, and not really listening to his words. And some of his ideas are frightening me. It is is disturbing to watch so many of the people I know and don't know who are content to put their faith in John Kerry without questioning his beliefs and plans. And isn't this what has gotten us into this mess to begin with, a very long history of voter complacency and inaction and a contentment with hero worship and subjugation of one's own intuition and inner voice. And I wonder if I might not vote in a presidential election for the first time since 1992, which was the only time I didn't vote in a presidential election (I registered in Flagstaff, Arizona, and they simply didn't have a record of it). And this life-long job of the pursuit of life, liberty and happiness also appears to be a quest for personal sanity in an increasingly delusional world.